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I wanted to play football, reveals Peter Moyo

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Rumbidzai Mhlanga, Sunday Life Reporter 

WHILE other people are born to families of musicians, others become musicians because they are talented and take a liking to the trade. 

Talent in some families runs in the veins. If its singing it becomes a family of singers, while other families are blessed with different talents. Like chieftaincy, being a musician in Zimbabwe seems to be passed from one generation to another as children take over from where their parents would have left off.

Unlike other artistes, the offsprings of musicians rarely suffer for recognition or to get off the ground as they use their well-known parents’ reputations to get to the industry.

One would point out that even before people got to know what Ammara Brown or Selmor Mtukudzi sing about they already loved them, their names became popular even before their music was. But some just follow their father’s footsteps even if they had their own preferred career paths.

In an interview Peter Moyo, son of the late legendary sungura musician Tongai Dewa Moyo, who took over the reigns after the legend’s death told this publication that being a musician was not part of his plans, but he became a musician to honour his father’s wish.

“I was a professional footballer and never dreamt of being a musician but my father asked me to carry on his music legacy on his death bed so I had to respect and honour his wish, but for the past seven years I have fallen in love with music, it is now in my veins, it is now my life,” Moyo said. — @ruekushie


The birth, rise of Bolamba arts

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Mthabisi Tshuma, Sunday Life Correspondent

AS Mzilikazi headed south fleeing King Tshaka’s army during the 18th century, he had to assemble a backup  army and on the way he incorporated to the Ndebele kingdom — the Sotho, Tswana and Kalanga speaking people.

The Sotho speaking are a part of those left behind who later found solace and settled south of Gwanda.  Thirty kilometres from the Gwanda-Beitbridge highway, lies the mining town’s “Redwood”, Ntepe Business Centre. From here, two routes emerge that lead to the village, Kafusi. One passes through the missionary school Manama High and the other via Gungwe which is home to late national hero, educationist Professor Makhurane.

With either route from Ntepe, 80 kilometres later lands one to the home of Bolamba Performing Arts group. As one reaches Kafusi, they are welcomed by the refreshed silence and embracement of the Sotho culture. Their brown teeth have raised questions in most circles and for the record it is because of the salty water they drink from a tender age.

By 2009, technological advancements had not yet reached the village associated with poor network coverage. With nothing to do for entertainment purposes, Bolamba Arts founding member Mthabisi Dube, by then a temporary teacher at Kafusi Secondary School went on to form the group with his workmates.

Speaking to Sunday Life, Dube recalls their bumpy decade long journey from the rural areas to the regional arts circle where they started off as a seven-member mbube outfit.

“We formed the group in 2009 Singamajida (as men only) with a colleague I worked with at the school and an Agritex officer for entertainment purposes. We were all about imbube by that time and performed at the school’s functions mostly,” he recalls.

During the late 2000’s Green Horse bus which went on a daily routine from the City of Kings and Queens to Alphant, was the only mode of transport one could use to reach the not so popular area.

With no established market for the Bolamba group, Dube went on to study nursing in 2011 with the group folding for three years. Coming back from his training in 2014 his passion led to resurrection of the rural-based group.

“When I came back from the nursing course I saw it fit to revive the group so that my village counterparts can have something to do in life,” he says.

Bolamba Performing Arts came with a new style of the traditional dances and started to perform at schools around the district. They made their debut appearance at the 2014 Chibuku Neshamwari provincial dance competitions were they took position two.

Since then, they have not looked back. They have grown to be a 16 -member traditional outfit with nine males and seven women with some throwing in the towel along the way which has not been all that rosy. 

Three of the group members are civil servants with the rest taking the arts group as a day job.

“To tell the truth, it has not been easy from where we came from. A lot of people that we started with have had to part ways with us. If you have a vision, you do not surrender easily. I have always stood firm in growing the brand and this has kept the group at its best level. Our performances which have seen us winning here and there have motivated to the group. 

“Those that are full time in rehearsing and performing know the reason for our success,” Dube says.

The soft spoken Bolamba Performing Arts group director says to land a gig, as an arts group situated at a rural area with corrugated road network was not that easy in the past. 

“It has been a challenging encounter throughout the way with getting shows not going quite well. Our award nominations and achievements have come to the rescue as we are starting to get recognition nationwide and even outside the country,” he says.

The group will perform at the Babirwa Arts Festival to be held at the end of May in Bobonong in Botswana and thereafter head to Limpopo (South Africa) for the Mapungubwe Arts Festival scheduled for August.

The Bolamba Performing Arts dream is to appear on the international music scene and they are calling on sponsors to make the wish a reality.

Chat with Sis Noe…She lost sex drive after giving birth

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Hi Sis Noe

MY boyfriend of one month dumped me because I refused to sleep with him. He said since I am a single mother I should not be so strict when it comes to sex. 

Reply

What did he mean exactly by saying you should not be strict when it comes to sex? It sounds as though he expects you to open your legs for him like a chicken on a barbeque because you have a baby and was angry or disappointed that you didn’t make it easy for him. I could go on about double standards and how unfair this is, but ultimately, what matters here is that he is no gentleman. Forget him. In future, don’t have sex simply because you feel a man expects it or that you need to please him. Relationships started slowly tend to be the ones that last.

Hi Sis Noe

Last year when I was struggling financially I discovered that my wife had an affair. She says they did not have sex but I saw nude pictures of the man on her phone and people have told me they once saw them at a hotel. 

Reply

The discovery of an affair is such a betrayal and the thought of the woman you love making love to someone else is devastating. It is particularly hard that it was at a time when you needed her the most, though sadly it sometimes happens that people have affairs when their partner is very stressed or preoccupied with something else because they have little time for them but that is very selfish. An angry response when questioned is usually because someone feels guilty and is afraid of repercussions if they admit to the truth. Explain to her that if you are ever to understand or forgive her, it is important that you talk about it together. If he meant so little to her, why did she put your marriage at risk by having an affair? Are there areas in your relationship that need some attention? For example, did you no longer feel close to each other, were there lots of arguments or a mismatch of sexual desire? Or did this other man make himself very available and she was tempted by the idea of sex with someone new? Whatever the reason she needs to be honest with you, show you how sorry she is and how much she wants to be with you.

Hi Sis Noe

Ever since my wife gave birth her sex drive has gone down. We rarely have sex because she has to look after the baby. She has also gone back to work and that has made things much worse.

Reply

You need to talk to your wife and try to understand why she is avoiding sexual intimacy. She may be simply exhausted trying to juggle a young child and a career. For most women to feel sexually close to their partners, they need to feel emotionally connected, and I wonder if she feels neglected or resentful because she now has so much on her hands. Such things happen. Or have you somehow both stopped really talking to each other about how you think and feel, your hopes, fears, needs and dreams?

Hi Sis Noe

I am in love with a woman who lost her husband two years ago. But it seems she has not forgotten him because at times she feels guilty for being with me a year after he died. At times she asks for time alone and thinks about breaking things up.

Reply

She met you only a year after her husband died; it sounds as though her grief was still raw and she feels guilty for finding happiness again. However, I am sure her husband would not have wanted her to be lonely or miserable. Most people would want their partner to find someone else if they died it doesn’t take away the love they had for them. Explain this to her. Say you understand how she feels and that you want to help her with her grief as you would be devastated if you split up. Explain you never fully get over the loss of someone you have loved but, over time, you learn to live with it and it gets easier.

Hi Sis Noe

I have been married for a year but I am still not pregnant. What is wrong with me? Help please, I am worried. — Worried.

Reply

Don’t you think it’s too soon to be anxious? I mean it’s only 12 months to be desperate. Pregnancy is a matter of chance. Conception does not always happen even if the egg and sperm are in the right place at the right time. The length of time it takes couples to conceive varies considerably. Failing to conceive even after a year does not necessarily mean that something is wrong. 

The chance of getting pregnant during a woman’s cycle varies due to a wide range of factors: For a woman aged 20 to 25, the chances of conceiving are around 25 percent for each cycle. Statistics prove that one in 10 couples will take more than a year to conceive. One of the secret tips on getting pregnant really involves the woman’s monthly cycle . . . this should really not come as a surprise, but lots of women have probably forgotten lots of their basic biology. A woman ovulates once a month, and the ovum or egg lasts for approximately 12 hours. 

During this 12-hour period, the egg has to be fertilised or it dries up and is no longer viable. Obviously, then, having unprotected sex any other time of the month could not possibly result in conception. It is only when you have sex during the 12-hour window that a couple can conceive — it’s really quite miraculous that a woman can even get pregnant at all! 

When a couple is trying to conceive, the trick is to catch the egg around day 14 of the woman’s monthly cycle. To add to the difficulty, every woman’s cycle is different. The 28-day cycle is the average, but normal cycles can vary from 23 days to 35 days. So please stop worrying, keep going at it like rabbits. Hopefully, before long there will be a bun in the oven.

Eye on Fashion: Underwear edition: For men

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Rutendo Chidawanyika

FOR this article I got all the help I could from my fellas. Men need help too from time to time especially on sensitive topics such as UNDERWEAR. I’d recommend all men who will read this article, to take this advice to heart and use it. Some men may need help in figuring out how many underwears should one own or on which material is best suited. I hope this article will leave you answers.

Here we go. Answers to questions you’ve been dying to ask.

Briefs or boxers? — Variety is good here and there, but it also depends on your age. It’s really a matter of personal preference; boxers give more breathing room while briefs give you support. Most men I spoke too said they prefer boxers. None of them voted for thongs. Whatever you are comfortable in.

What’s the best fabric for underwear? — One of the most challenging aspects of buying underwear is selecting the best fabric choice. Men’s underwear is available in a variety of fabrics, including nylon, cotton, modal, silk and lycra. Fabric comes into play when you decide what the occasion is. Silk underwear is definitely not for a workout. Cotton is usually the best option as is it good on skin and breathable.

When should you wash your underwear? — The answer is after wearing it. Wear them once then wash them. During physical activity or a strenuous gym session, you sweat. You don’t only sweat at the gym but during any other activity. Sweaty underwear is not attractive or comfortable. Practice good hygiene and wash your underpants after each wear.

How many pairs of underwear should a man own? — Most men said 7-10 underwear, one for each day of the week. I think 20 will do, having a three-week supply of underwear makes more sense. This doesn’t mean you have to wash them all at once. You can wear one during the day then shower before bed and wear a fresh pair. Do not buy them all at once, buy them gradually.

When should underwear be thrown away? — Don’t hold on to the underwear till they are shredded and ripped. As a rule of thumb, men should replace their underwear once a year. Start off by disposing all of the faded and saggy underwear in your wardrobe. Any underwear that has holes or stains, gotta go. When the elastic band loses elasticity, send it straight to the bin. Don’t keep the underwear after weight gain/loss in hopes of going back to your ‘‘size’’.

How to buy underwear? — Check for brands, some brands have a longer life span. I know some men like particular brands and that’s okay, as long as you can afford them. Unfortunately you cannot try underwear before purchase but you can buy based on the size of your pants/ trousers. Please make sure it’s the right size and fits comfortable. You and your tools have to be comfortable. Buy nice underwear too for the ladies, we notice.

The importance of underwear

They provide comfort

It takes special people to leave home without underwear. Just don’t do it. Underwear gives you comfort. Comfort and protection from harsh fabrics against your skin.

No leaks exposed 

This one is self-explanatory. Just keep those leaks in check.

In case of an accident 

Imagine if your pants ripped in public and you had no underwear on. That would be mortifying! But with underwear on, it wouldn’t be as embarrassing. To be safe, always wear some.

Prevent chaffing down there 

Chaffing is a skin irritation that occurs when skin repeatedly rubs against skins or clothes. The fabric of your pants, jeans, or shorts could be abrasive to your groin. Such clothes aren’t usually designed to be particularly gentle on this sensitive body part, unlike underwear.

Get rid of sweat stains 

Apart from absorbing sweat well, underwear act as a second layer of clothing that traps and prevents your sweat from staining your pants, jeans or shorts. Remember that you cannot donate old underwear, just burn it. 

Thank so much to my fellas who helped me put this piece together. —rutendochidawanyika3@gmail.com

Not perfect, but good enough

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Nhlalwenhle Ncube

WHEN we were growing up we were made to believe that one should get married to that person referred to as the “perfect partner”. But with time after celebrating few decades on earth, you then realise that there is no such thing called a perfect partner. 

In your life journey you realise that the people you always fall in love with appear to be perfect at the beginning, but later on hurt and leave you heartbroken. Surprisingly, the hope of meeting that perfect somebody does not easily die as you will always be convinced that next time you will press the right button only to be disappointed again and again. 

When you are in a relationship, you are bound to notice weaknesses of your better half and have the fantasy of believing that there is someone better out there. Some even go as far as listing what this perfect partner should look and be like, how they dress, complexion and even their profession. This whole thing of believing in the existence of perfect partners will keep you confused, stuck and not happy at all. From every relationship, you will be saying “but”. Wishing if only he was like this and that. You will jump from one relationship to another until you are out of “market no longer appetising” and happening. 

After failing to get a perfect partner, you will then be left heartbroken and a bitter person. You will feel like people used you while in fact you were the one who was in search of non-existent species. 

There is no perfect woman or man in the world. All human beings have weaknesses. So if you get into a relationship expecting your partner to be flawless, you will get surprises. Always bear in mind that love is not an easy thing. It is unfortunate that we were sold a false fantasy through songs, romance novels and movies that they lived happily forever after meeting the perfect partner. I think all movies must have an extra episode to show us reality of life that although it all seemed well at the beginning, they had some challenges in life. 

The perfect partner issue often causes some people to have unrealistic expectations of others which then leads to a great deal of emotional pain in and out of relationships. I know someone is then asking, “So what’s the alternative if there are no perfect partners out there? Must I give up and just settle with anyone?” NO! 

Knowing that no one is perfect, you can then settle down with good enough kind of person. 

The good enough partner is an idea derived from the concept of the “Good Enough Parent”. The good enough parent is one who had sound nurturing instincts, devotion to the child and ultimately inevitably screwed up and “failed” as a parent in a way that allowed their children to experience disillusionment with them and the world in ways that felt manageable and tolerable.

In other words, they helped their children to learn how to cope with and face an imperfect world including themselves as imperfect parents — a key developmental task that children must face in their development and emotional growth towards adulthood.

A good enough partner is the one with sound relational instincts, devotion to the relationship, and who screwed up or “failed” in ways that actually helped foster your growth and development as adults. In real life, this might look like someone who meets most of your deep needs but not all of your surface wants.

It might mean a partner who, because of their imperfections, actually allows you to grow stronger in your personal empowerment and ability to navigate through the world. At least reframing your expectations from seeking out a perfect partner to a good enough one might allow you to more ease-fully connect and form relationships with others you may have previously disregarded because they didn’t measure up to the fantasy of “perfect.” 

The good enough partner is that one whom you can tolerate and have that connection which can’t be seen by eye but instead felt through the heart and soul. In other words, it’s that person whom you describe to your friends saying, “We click very well and no matter our differences we always find common ground”. It also includes commitment to you and to the relationship, willingness to grow, someone who will not run away from the hard stuff of life and someone whose soul you love. The expectations of meeting the perfect partner creates, for many, hugely unreasonable expectations that might get in the way of connecting and experiencing the love they are longing for. I urge you to search for a good enough partner — someone who has the qualities and characteristics that you personally believe can provide a sound relational home for you to grow in. But even when you find or embrace a relationship with this person, I can guarantee you it won’t always be easy.

I think that another thing that causes pain for many people in relationships is the myth that love is easy. This is untrue. Love, specifically romantic love, I truly believe, is challenging. It’s hard. And it’s hard for a reason, whenever you get two or more people together, conflict is inevitable at some point. And if you throw those two people into a relationship where they live together, share the same bed, juggle work, have in-laws, sex, money and all the other triggering stuff of life, love is going to inevitably get tough sometimes. And that’s okay, that’s actually normal. But that’s not what the collective social message would have us believe so, inevitably, when things get tough, rough and challenging, many get scared and assume that they are in wrong relationship with the wrong person and should hunt for the perfect one.

No one is perfect and the best you can get is a good enough kind of person.

Let’s get talking on womenforum460@gmail.com

The murder of Themba Ndimane …The tale of Zimbabwe’s last executed death row inmate

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Bruce Ndlovu, Sunday Life Reporter 

THE last time that patrons at Crossroads Shopping Centre in Silobela in the Midlands saw Themba Ndimane was at 10pm, as he left with a man that he seemed to have struck an instant acquaintance with. 

According to those that had been there on the night, the two men had indeed seemed like old acquaintances, behaving like old friends as they downed litre after litre of opaque beer. 

According to one imbiber, a man only known as Khumalo in court records, the two would seemingly leave together. One of those two men, Ndimane, would not see the break of a new day.     

“The evidence of the State witness, Khumalo, was to the effect that he saw the deceased and the appellant (Masina) leave Crossroads Shopping Centre together at about 10 o’clock in the evening. He observed them walk towards the road to Kwekwe until he lost sight of them,” court records show.

When the man that Ndimane left with, Mandlenkosi “Never” Masina returned, he would do so alone, having seemingly “lost” his friend a few moments earlier. 

“A short while later, (Masina) returned alone and collected both his and the deceased’s belongings. The deceased was found dead the following day,” the court’s records say.

When Ndimane was found the next day, he had lost more than his belongings. He had lost his life in the most brutal and tragic of ways. When his bloodied body was discovered, Ndimane had two stab wounds on the anterior aspect of neck, one wound on the left lower sternal edge — associated left-sided haemopneumothoraxis, one wound on the left lumber region — no associated bowel perforation, one wound on the forehead and one wound at the back lumber region. The coroner’s final conclusion was glaringly clear. 

“As a result of the foregoing examination I am of the opinion that the cause of death was (1) Left-sided haemopneumothoraxis secondary to stab wounds of the chest (2) haemorrhage and shock. That being the case, the only remaining issue is the identity of the deceased’s killer.”

The hunt for Ndimane’s killer would be a short and sharp one, with fingers pointing towards the man who had been last seen with him, as they left the Crossroads Shopping Centre, swallowed by the darkness late that evening on the road to Kwekwe. 

After intense questioning by the police, Masina would admit to the murder of Ndimane, a man who he had met by chance on that fateful at the shopping centre. The two had been no strangers, however, as they had met in 1998 while they both served sentences at Kwekwe Prison. That earlier encounter behind bars and the chance meeting at that Kwekwe watering hole would cost Ndimane his life. 

“I admit to the charge put against me. On the day in question, I left Zibomvu area where I had visited my mother, Maria Ndlovu, and proceeded to Crossroads in Silobela. On arrival I bought opaque beer (two scuds). While I was drinking Themba Ndimane, whom I had met at Kwekwe Prison in 1998, arrived. We drank together and a lot of people who(m) I did not know arrived. They bought beer and we ended (up) drinking together. The deceased was one of these people,” his confessional statement to the police.

As the alcohol flowed, the hours ticked and as the hour hand moved closer to midnight, Ndimane realised that he would not be able to find a place to rest for that night. It was then that he made a fatal mistake as he, believing that Masina was a Good Samaritan, asked the man who he had once served with in prison to give him sanctuary. 

“We drank beer until the beerhall was closed and all other people whom we were drinking with went away. I remained behind with the deceased. The deceased requested me to take him to the place where I was staying because it was late and he had no place to put up. I agreed and we left together,” Masina said. 

Moments later, Ndimane was to lose his life near a borehole, stabbed four times by the man who had earlier on promised him a bed. 

“We were near a borehole. I decided to rob him. Therefore I drew my Okapi knife and stabbed him four times on the left side of his body. When he had fallen down, I searched him and took cash $300-00, removed his pair of shoes and further took his travelling bag which was containing groceries and a plough share and I took the property to my mother’s homestead in Zibomvu area. I left all this property at my mother’s homestead with the exception of the cash which I spent,” he said.

Ndimane was later convicted and sentenced to death but that was not to be the end of the matter. After the conviction he appealed, claiming that he had confessed to the police while under duress. 

When Chief Justices Chidyausiku, Malaba and Gwaunza heard his case in Bulawayo on 6 October 2002, they decided that his appeal had no merit. 

“There was a feeble attempt by the appellant to challenge both the admissibility and genuineness of the confession. The court a quo dismissed the challenge for a number of reasons. The appellant was unable to prove how he was coerced. The statement contained a wealth of detail that could only have come from a person involved in the killing of the deceased.”

Masina would meet his end at the end of a hangman’s noose on 22 July, 2005, infamously becoming the last life that the country’s executioner took before he retired the following year. 

Last week, the country’s Justice Minister Ziyambi Ziyambi reportedly told a Non Governmental Organisation, Veritas Zimbabwe, that he was opposed to the death penalty as it is against the country’s culture. President Mgangagwa has also spoken against the death penalty. About 101 inmates currently on death row wait with baited breath to see if this indeed becomes a reality.

Almost 14 years since he breathed his last at the gallows, Mandlenkosi “Never” Masina might live forever in infamy as the last man to have ever been executed in Zimbabwe. 

The ‘scania’ musician . . . Knowledge Nkiwane’s life on the street

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Bruce Ndlovu, Sunday Life Reporter 

BEFORE the crowds in downtown Bulawayo hear his voice at daybreak, Knowledge Nkiwane wakes up at four in the morning and prepares to go to the gym. 

Gym sessions at dawn are a habit that Nkiwane, who alternates between Bulawayo and Johannesburg for most of the year, has learnt is indispensable.  Nkiwane is a celebrity of sorts in downtown Bulawayo, where he walks around town with a scania or pushcart, his music blaring from a loud public address system. 

“I wake up at 4:30 and by 5 o’clock I’m at the gym because you can’t do this if you’re not physically fit,” he says. 

When Sunday Life catches up with Nkiwane, he is on a break, with the speaker that was blaring only moments before completely silent. His microphone rests on the trolley in between the generator and speaker, and once in a while people who are evidently fans walk up to embrace and talk to him, with some showing concern. What has gone wrong? Why isn’t the music playing? 

Nkiwane assures them that sweet gospel melodies will soon flow down their ears. All his visitors depart with smiles on their faces. Despite his own assurances, Nkiwane is worried about the price of fuel, as his thirsty generator now sometimes takes two 5-litre gulps of the precious liquid every day. 

But the pushcart rolls on and Nkiwane, who says he used to sell as many as 700 copies of his gospel CDs per day, continues on his merry way. This was before the economic pinch and now Nkiwane says he mostly sells between 100 and 150 copies daily. 

“Every day at 6am I’m at the markets or Hyper before I leave for Renkini where the buses mostly leave at 9am. From 9:30am we’re in town moving around until the end of the day,” he says. 

For some artistes, pushing a scania around Bulawayo would be out of the question. However, for Nkiwane making himself a mobile music vendor was a masterstroke that managed to get him into spaces he never before imagined.

“The idea behind a scania is that it can get anywhere. When I started doing this people would say he has two cars, why doesn’t he use one of them to sell his music but if you go to some termini for example they don’t allow cars in there, only push carts. At Renkini they make you pay for taking a car inside. With a pushcart you can find me at Hyper now and in a totally different place later on. I move around with flexibility,” says Nkiwane, a man who started taking music seriously in 1996 when he became a devout Christian. 

While he began only selling his music from a pushcart without much mobility, Nkiwane says he realised that moving around was a more effective strategy. 

“When we started we would start at Renkini. We would just get a scania and then just lay out our products either at Renkini or Egodini. As time went on and I thought that while we were on our way to these destinations, there were a lot of people that we passed on the way. So this scania that we use to carry the music we’re selling, why don’t we also use it play the music and advertise it to people that might want to buy while we are on the road,” he says.

Nkiwane, who hires his scania for $20 daily, says he was forced onto the streets when he realised that taking his music to radio stations was futile. 

“One thing I also realised is that when you’re a young artiste and trying to catch a break in the industry you meet one obstacle, and that is the fact that when we take our music to radio stations it just accumulates without getting airplay. Maybe things are a bit different now with the emergence of the likes of Skyz Metro and Khulumani FM who try to look after local talent. 

“Before that, all the music would just get played on the day that you did an interview and on other days it would be quiet. So instead of going to the radio stations, rather we go the streets and start growing our own fanbases,” he says.

Vendors, long distance travellers, illegal money changers and even touts form the bulk of his “customers” and the musician, who left the group Gospel Impact to go solo in 2012, says that their loyalty to him would rival that of any superstar anywhere. 

“So far I would say it’s working because I personally don’t got to WhatsApp groups to tell people to vote for me but my music is on Top 10 lists, it’s always there because of the love that people have for the music out of the pureness of their hearts,” he said.

While some artistes might think that dancing is beneath them, for Nkiwane, it is an indispensable part of his work. It is a teaser of what fans can expect if they come to his live shows. 

“You must have a way to sell and a way for people to follow your music. For example, some of us dance but not all of the gospel musicians in Bulawayo dance. We did that because we want people to know what to expect when we arrange a show in town. We’ve done city to city shows in Gweru, Kwekwe, Kadoma, Chegutu, Masvingo and other cities and people know what I’m all about. 

“The only city I haven’t visited is Mutare. So people’s expectation when they hear Nkiwane is in town is always up there because they know already what I can do at a live show. With other artistes I think they’ll be questioning what this guy can do on stage hence they’ll not be ready to part with their money whenever they know they’ve got a show,” he says. 

With two albums this year and a nomination for the Bulawayo Arts Awards, hard work is something that comes easy for the man who discovered his talent at Dlawa Primary School in Nkayi. While others can claim to possess the voices of angels, Nkiwane says this is not enough to make it in today’s dog eat dog world of music. 

“It’s good to have a voice but there’s a part of gospel music that’s purely entertainment. You have to entertain fans for them to listen to you. If you don’t they won’t listen and that’s a very important aspect,” he says.

While other artistes moan about piracy, Nkiwane is happy to see his scotch cart push past young vendors selling his music. While some attack these music “thieves”, Nkiwane wonders where they expect people to get access to their music when most shops that used to sell it are now defunct. 

“The unfortunate thing that we face now is that we no longer have music shops. Only the boys that pirate music and as much as we might blame them we have to recognise that there’re no music shops anymore and we have to go to the streets if we want to sell our music now. When Nkiwane is not around in Zimbabwe, people know that when they want his music they’ve got to go on the street,” he says.

MSU celebrates Culture Week in style

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Mthabisi Tshuma, Sunday Life Correspondent

FOR over a decade, Midlands State University (MSU) has lived up to billing by upholding cultural diversity in the institution that is home to over five different nationalities.

Running under the theme, “Creating it in our own image: Intersections of culture, Innovation and African Development”, Director of National Arts Council of Zimbabwe (NACZ) Nicholas Moyo hailed the event which coincided with the Culture Week celebrations nationwide.

This year’s Culture Week was officially launched last week by President Emmerson Mnangagwa, a move which shows the desire by the Second Republic to uplift the arts sector.

Not only is MSU home to the Ndebele, Shona, Tonga, Sotho, Kalanga and Nambya language speaking students but also has the Tshiluba which is spoke in DRC, Oshiwambo in Namibia, Dinka in South Sudan, Portuguese in Mozambique and Swahili in Uganda.

“We are here celebrating the International Cultural Diversity Carnival but I am addressing the audience using English. If I had to speak in Ndebele I am sure half of us would not understand my presentation. As Africans this is what has killed us. Look at the Chinese, when they are here they would not substitute their language in their conversations whereas for us Africans even if we had to travel to Europe we would speak in English even for conversations we are only familiar with,” said Moyo.

“The only way to work out this is if there is an appreciation and valuing of each culture which derives unity and leads to economic prosperity as said by President Mnangagwa in launching the week of embracing cultural diversity,”  he added.

He went on to lash at the young generation who have lost touch in culture and are not fully embracing it.

MSU Acting Vice-Chancellor Professor Kadmiel Wekwete said as an institution they will continue to ensure that they embrace the diversity of African cultures.

“Indeed we are a cultural melting pot and it is important for us to engender harmonious relations by promoting mutual understanding among our different communities. We seek to produce graduates sensitive to cultural pluralism. As a university we are an ethnically and linguistically diverse community. Our curriculum is attuned to the promotion and celebration of cultural diversity,” he said.


The truth about RoilBAA Awards

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Raisedon Baya

THE buzz is on. The Bulawayo Arts Awards are a month away and almost everyone is talking about them. Different people are excited for different reasons. For starters artistes who were nominated are quite excited about making it into the list. We all know it has been tough to put works out there with the kind of economic environment prevailing in the country. Most nominees have gone to town to tell friends and fans alike that they are nominated and need their support in bringing the award home. 

And those who didn’t make the list had their own views — good and bad about the awards. The general public is also just excited about the event as it offers many possibilities to them, most of their excitement is based on previous experience or what they heard about previous awards ceremonies. For the general public the awards offer an opportunity to celebrate creative sons and daughters of the city. It also offers them an opportunity to celebrate the city as a cultural and creative space. But more importantly it is an event that has come in to just offer a silly excuse to spoil oneself or show off one’s clothes or treat a partner or spouse to a great evening.  

One frightening truth for artistes as the event gets bigger and bigger is that the awards are slowly becoming about everyone, and not just artistes. While awards centre around artistes, their nomination and winning, it is becoming obvious that more than half the people that attend might not even have a clue about the nominees and their work. To them they are coming to “the biggest dress-up event in Bulawayo,” and all they want is to show off their dresses, hairstyles, partners, drink, take pictures to post on social media and just have fun. And what does this mean for our artistes? It simply means our artistes have to put extra effort both on stage and outside as there will be competition in all directions. 

The stars of the night must always be artistes but if they fail to bring their A-game to the event others will take over. If the stars of the event don’t dress-up and own the event, others will come and take over and make it theirs. If the stars of the event don’t put up a show that will leave people talking and them trending on social media others will definitely do it. 

The evolving dream around the awards is to make them first, the premier event in the city. An event people will start talking about and preparing for months before it even happens. It must be “The Event” to go for all. Secondly, the dream is to make the awards a platform where people come to make fashion statements — it must have the fashion sector excited and dreaming. In the years to come the awards must become a version of the Durban July. We must have people coming from all directions of the country just to have fun at the awards ceremony. And for corporates it must be the event to be seen supporting, one that will give total brand visibility. 

Away from the awards this is a special week for the arts sector as we are celebrating Culture Week and also Africa Day. Culture week is celebrated nationally, pushed by the National Arts Council of Zimbabwe through its provincial administrators. On Wednesday the Bulawayo province had its launch at Ntumbane Hall. The launch included several cultural acts and traditional food. Many schools and organisations are celebrating Africa Day. However, the biggest event happened yesterday at Salukazi Youth Centre dubbed Africa Day in Njube. More about this day next week. 

Bulawayo holds Culture Week celebrations

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Rumbidzai Mhlanga, Sunday Life Reporter

NATIONAL Arts Council of Zimbabwe launched the Culture Week celebrations in Bulawayo last Wednesday at Entumbane Hall with Minister of State for Provincial Affairs in Bulawayo Judith Ncube as a guest of honour.

This year’s celebrations run under the theme, “African Royalty Our Heritage”, which encourages Zimbabwe to promote, commemorate and uphold different cultures. It is also an attempt to gather communities to celebrate culture and growth.

In her welcoming speech National Arts Council of Zimbabwe Bulawayo director Charity Nyathi said; “With reference to Zimbabwe the celebrations that run for a week assume national outlook that enables the nation to reflect on its culture. Culture week activities this year will revolve around the diverse traditional dances and other art forms both performing and non-performing depicting important cultural ceremonies.” 

The Culture Week which this year is dedicated to honouring female artistes and hence the first performance was from the only female acclaimed Nobuntu imbube group which warmed the stage with their marvellous Imbube melodies.

The director had a special welcome for one of the oldest women group Thandanani Women’s Ensemble.

“As it is the day for women we called the Thandanani Women’s Ensemble, one of the oldest art groups which has soldiered on regardless of economic times but were determined and continued with their journey,” added Nyathi

To spice up the festivities there were also performances from the Thandanani Women’s Ensemble which is well known and honoured for the role they play in preserving the African Culture and to the close the celebrations for the day was Ezimnyama Dance Group.

Minister of State for Provincial Affairs in Bulawayo Judith Ncube condemned the way artistes were looked down upon.

“The art industry is not recognised as an industry that should generate income hence even if we hire them to perform to our activities we want to give them peanuts, not realising it is their source of income.

“We as people of Bulawayo should stand up and defend what we have as a city and as a country by supporting each other, recognise and appreciate what they are doing because if we do not do that we are destroying the talent we have.”

Summer fashion trends

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Rutendo Chidawanyika 

I KNOW I’m not the only one looking forward to summer. We are not yet in the month of June but I can’t wait to get rid of turtle necks and long boots. Now, the trick with summer clothes is that they are cheaper in winter. Because everyone is busy buying winter clothes, the price of winter clothes goes down. If you are planning ahead like I am;

These are the summer essentials:

White denim 

White denim is everthing! When the temperatures rise, nothing looks cooler or more put together than crisp white denim. Try pairing any white pants or skirt with a top in a conservational print and a pair of bright slides. White is always a clean look. You can never be wrong, especially in summer.

 

Summer sandals

Slip into summer sandals. Summer’s the perfect time to wear a new pair of sandals. Slide sandals are great for their comfort and ease just like flip flops. A bold colour adds so much more style to your step and takes any summer outfit to the next level. Make sure your feet are well taken care of and manicured.

DO denim

Dress up your denim. Distressed denim paired with dressier pieces results in a high-low look that is so fashion. Try your jeans or cutoffs with a flirty top, cute clutch and a pair of bright slides. Denim is always in fashion however, in summer we shy away from the deep navy denims to the lighter washes of denim. Do your short denim skirts, denim tops or even a denim jacket.

Prints and patterns 

Explore prints and patterns. Summer time is packed with events to attend. Try something new this year and show up to the next bridal shower, lunch or show wearing an in your face floral print or a splash of geometric pattern. You will be the envy of everybody.

Flowy styles

Embrace loose, flowy styles. Try a fashion-forward ruffled top that skims your body. You can even wear it to work topped with a blazer or cute cardigan. This is the right season for maxi dresses, flowy off-shoulder tops and A-line dresses.

White sneakers

Rock white sneakers and stay winning. Clean white sneakers are happening this summer and you can pair them with everything from  jeans to sundresses to a mini. Cute and comfy! Get yourself any label or no label, just make sure they are clean.

Dare to bare 

Pick pieces with a serious punch of colour like coral, blue or yellow for a fresh, summer look. Pair your summer brights with neutrals you already know and love.

Natural fibres 

When it comes to fabrics, choose lighter options like cotton, rayon and linen. Breathable fabric is key when the sun comes out to play. Fabric plays a big role in the summer season, its hot and we sweat a lot. We need something cool enough to allow air circulation and absorbs sweat easily. 

Shorts, shorts, shorts

Pick the perfect pair of shorts that flatter your body and fit. Its shorts season in summer, so pick a good pair and stick to them. Pair your shorts with a nice top and sneakers or gladiators.

You don’t have to get summer ready all at once. It’s a matter of recycling what you already own and adding on a few pieces. Get your pieces way ahead of summer.-Additional information from online sources.

Email: rutendochidawanyika3@gmail.com

Disappointments, a normal thing

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Nhlalwenhle Ncube

IN an ideal world, all our relationships would be balanced, fulfilling and no one would be disappointed.

But when you are disappointed by someone you love it feels awful. But as  fate will have it, getting disappointments is normal and somehow it’s bound to happen. The reality is that you will encounter disappointment at some point in life. And that can make abandoning the relationship or distancing yourself emotionally — very tempting because you will be hurt. 

But just because there are disappointments, doesn’t mean you should give up! After all, disappointment doesn’t come from animosity, or even from a lack of love, but from expectations not being met. The damage happens when you allow disappointment to fester, slowly poisoning your relationships.

In relationships, women are usually the most affected when it comes to disappointments. At times the man would have lived a fake life resulting in her having higher expectations. When in marriage only to discover that she was sold a dummy. She gets disappointed because she had high expectations. 

At times the less love and attention you later receive, leaves you weak and disappointed. When you start staying together, somebody stops giving you attention as he used to do. Your romance life dies and you get to miss just a kiss! 

Even after sacrificing a lot for the relationship, your better half may choose to act blind and give you some treatment which will leave you hurting and regretting on why you had believed in him so much. Even the issue of being treated as the second best brings nothing but heartache. After being convinced that you are the Queen of his heart, you discover that maybe your husband’s sister or mum appear to be more important than you. Whatever you plan, it has to get approval from them or at times they get more presents than you do. 

Enough with women’s disappointments.  Men also get disappointed when you fail to do your duties as a woman. It is sad that nowadays there are women who can’t cook or clean the house. The only thing that they can do well is talking and shouting. At least when you are bad in other things better be good in bed so he has something to comfort him. 

Partners who are also not supportive in your life are also a disappointment. Some other issues which result in disappointment include lies, selfishness, pride and not caring and loving as one used to be.

The good thing is that disappointments are normal and manageable. No one got married to an angel so it’s bound to happen, but it must not destroy your relationship as you deserve healthier, happier times in your life. 

It is important not to concentrate on your disappointments, but move fast before it ruins your relationship. Some things in life you must learn to forgive and let go as soon as you have solved the problem.

Even after being disappointed, learn to be appreciative. The opposite of disappointment is appreciation. So to get past the disappointment, the first step is to appreciate yourself and others.

The easiest way to start is to appreciate what was done, rather than focusing on what didn’t happen. For example, imagine you asked your partner to join you and your friends for a weekend outing, but when he did, he was not really in a good mood. Instead of focusing on his mood, appreciate that he accepted your invite and sacrificed his time to be with you. By looking for the positive, you will notice all the things that your partner did, he tried his best which were steps towards getting what you really wanted.

In other words, it’s not all bad. By managing your expectations in this way, you will begin to appreciate your partner more and feel happier about the relationship. 

Most times people are disappointed because of having high expectations. To avoid unnecessary disappointments, one has to lower them a bit — but don’t give them up entirely!

One trap people fall into is having the lowest of expectations of someone they love, in order to avoid feeling any disappointment. But it’s just as bad to have ridiculously high and unrealistic expectations. An easy way to balance this is by focusing on “what is”, not on “what should be” — or what you wish it could be, someday.

If you focus on reality (instead of what the reality could be), you will find you are less disappointed in life, without expecting bad or irresponsible behaviour from someone you love. That doesn’t help anybody. 

On the other hand if you want to be safe, open up about your expectations. Ask yourself honestly: did you communicate exactly what you were expecting? Were you clear? Did they hear you and understand? Did they agree to do or give you want you asked for? Most times, disappointment boils down a misunderstanding. If you articulate your expectations well, you will find it much easier for the people in your life to meet them. 

Some people are always disappointed in relationships not because they meet the wrong people, but they want everyone to think and act like them. It is crucial to understand that people are different and not even a single soul is exactly like you. This is perhaps the most important step. Very often, we expect something to be done exactly how we would do it. But the truth is, just because you can do something well doesn’t mean the other person can and vice-versa.

Everyone has their own strengths. It’s important to understand that they aren’t the same for everyone. To expect from them what you would do if you were in the same situation is only setting yourself up for disappointment.

The truth is we can’t be rid of disappointments. They are a normal part of life. But the key to having a happier life and healthy relationships is to manage your expectations. 

Send your comments to womenforum460@gmail.com

Choosing between kids and decorating

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Amanda Ncube

MOST homeowners are forced to choose between kids and decorating their homes especially first time mothers . . . all of them choose kids, obviously. Having kids should not prevent you from having a beautiful home. 

First time mothers find it difficult to decorate their house, hence they let plastic toy explosion and milk stains rule their lives.

However, there are various ways to have both kids and a beautifully decorated home.

Here are some decorating tips to use to make your home look pretty without its first impression saying “we are giving up our home for the next coming 18 years.”

The main aim is to make your home durable, accessible and practical yet still stylish when you have kids.

Dark colours are usually perfect for a place with kids. You can have bright accents here and there to make your home stylish. Painting your doors with dark colours means you do not have to worry about dirty black fingerprint marks. Sure, they are probably still dirty from exploring little hands but your guest cannot tell.

Same applies to tables, using wood dining table or coffee table is pretty great. It saves you from having to worry about cleaning the table after every minute. By so doing the kid will be free to be anywhere in the house. 

Vintage style rugs are soft (for sprawling out during playtime on the floor) and durable . . . over-dyed rugs are perfect, not just because they are nice but because they hide stains really well. Make sure you avoid selecting colours that can easily show stains.

Place accessories in a tray on your coffee table, dressers, tops or dining room table and if the décor ever needs to be removed for game night or a big family meal or just for getting rough and rowdy you can just move the tray out without any struggles. 

Instead of always moving plants and flowers opt for fake ones so that you do not have to worry about them being poisonous. Keep an eye for fakes instead since they do not make a mess like the real ones and you do not have to think about their maintenance all the time. 

Slip covers help in keeping items underneath looking fresh and new. If there is ever spill just toss the slip cover in the wash and its as good as new. You can have them on living room sofas, armchairs and dining room chairs.

Cars to look out for: 2008 Mazda MPV

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Lovert Mafukure

Do you remember that Mazda Mpv that was famous for comfort and pretty looks? Yeah, that 2001 to 2006 model? 

It was a favourite for many and still is . . .  the only problem is that it is getting old. Like many Mazdas it had gearbox issues every now and then but it had comfort for days! With age its no longer that fashionable, it’s still a beauty but I mean it’s almost 20 years old. Some of all the problems related to these imports are because of age. 

The Mazda Mpv that came afterwards in 2008 is nothing less than a story of beauty and the beast. It’s still a minivan with the heart of a sports car. It does its job carrying around the whole family quite well and for dads like me, it still shows up when you need it to come out and play. 

It’s still a seven-seater mini sports wagon. Keyless entry comes standard with fully automatic sliding doors at the back. Middle row seats sit 2 people just like the predecessor while the back one can possibly sit 3 smaller people. The last row of seats folds down if more boot space is needed. 

The dash is more modern and has been revised in a great way. The gear lever has been moved from the column to the bottom of the entertainment screen. You also get buttons on the steering wheel to control the radio. Unlike the older model Mpv, this model comes with cup holders in the middle of the front seats. The older model did have cup holder that you could pull out but the empty space in between the seats was a bit of a bore. 

The Mazda Mpv has always been more of a sports car than it is a minivan . . . wait, that sounds weird, let me rephrase. The Mazda Mpv has always been a minivan with the heart and mind of a sports car. Deep down, the designers had the idea of a Minivan but came up with a sports van instead. It’s like they knew that there are people like me who like to work hard and play hard. I say sports van because this car has the same engine as the top of the line Mazda Atenza sport MPS. 

When I say MPS, you should get the idea that I’m talking of Mazda Performance Series and the engine in the MPS is nothing short of the 2,3L DISI turbo engine-it stands for Direct Injection Spark Ignition engine, you see where I’m getting at? This isn’t a minivan, it’s a sports van. It churns out an easy 260hp and you find the same engine in the Mazda Axela Sport and the Atenza sport but only the MPS models.

Before we get too happy, this special turbo 2,3l engine is only in select special models and the rest come with a naturally aspirated 2,3l 4 cylinder motor with some 160 plus horses. It sounds subtle but it also comes out to play when the need arises. The Mazda Mpv does not have a V6 engine option like its predecessor but do not belittle that 4 cylinder engine . . . its like a raging wild fire!

This particular Mazda Mpv isn’t so much like a Mazda when you look at it, it looks like something else. It is pretty and quite smooth, the whole finish is smooth and clean. You get a very large bumper upfront with a smiley face grill and some fog lights housed in shiny chrome trim. The upper grill has a chrome trim as well that gives it some sense of exoticness.

As I mentioned entry level Mazda Mpvs  have the 2,3l L3 VE engine as standard. VE engines come with variable Valve timing unlike the earlier model L3 DE engines that did not have variable valve timing. The higher spec has the 2,3l L3 VDT which is a turbocharged version of the L3 but it’s got Direct Injection as well while the L3VE has indirect injection. 

The engine transfers all its power through the Mazdas Active-matic electronically controlled 5-speed transmission. This is standard across all models except for the four-wheel drive model and the Direct Injection Spark Ignition turbo Engine model, these come with the Active-matic 6-speed electronically controlled automatic transmission. Unfortunately there aren’t any manual options coming out of Japan.

So the new Mazda Mpv is definitely a minivan to watch out for as it comes oozing with all that Japanese greatness. 

So far we have looked at the Estima, the Premacy and the Airwave and I must say I’m falling for this Mazda Mpv. I know for sure that Mazda makes their cars soft to the touch and they can whine when they want to but this car right here is slowly earning my respects, definitely something to look out for in the Minivan segment. Till next time, Happy Motoring! 

@lovert116 Automart Used Spares Centre Quality Used Japanese Spares  +263 772 33 99 38 – automartzw@gmail.com/ Facebook: @automartusc

GONE TO THE DOGS . . .Snake Pastor’ strikes once more, feeds his followers dog meat, Agai”

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Controversial “snake pastor” Prophet Penuel Mnguni is at it again. Mnguni, of the End Times Disciples Ministries, continues to feed his congregation dog meat as a holy communion. They drink a grape flavoured cold drink as sacramental wine.

On May 15, Mnguni posted pictures of the event on his Facebook page, where his followers devoured the cooked dog meat during what he mentioned was a Sunday Holy communion service. Among the worshippers pictured, was a toddler carrying a bone.

In another image, a worshipper carries the head of a dead dog. Others depict a dead dog with its throat slit. There are also pictures of uncooked and cooked dog meat in a plastic container.

It is against the law to sell dog meat for human consumption. Contravention of the Animals Protection Act. NSPCA public relations officer Meg Wilson said they were aware of the incident and understood the public’s outrage.

“This is not the only case where an animal is slaughtered for religious or cultural purposes — in fact, farm animals are regularly slaughtered in the name of religion and culture. The question to ask in any sacrificial ceremony is did the animal suffer? If any animal suffers before or during slaughter — it is unacceptable and a contravention of the Animals Protection Act. All animals matter to the NSPCA.

“The NSPCA is only able to work within the parameters of the law — if there is any evidence that the dog was slaughtered inhumanely, or suffered in any way, be it before or during the slaughter, witnesses need to come forward with this in order for appropriate action to be taken,” said Wilson.

In 2016, Mnguni made headlines after images of him driving over his congregants were posted on social media. He is also known for feeding his congregants snakes, hair and cockroaches. – Source: News24


How marriage breakdown led Zenzo to Jesus

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Bruce Ndlovu, Sunday Life Reporter

WHEN Zimbabwe was going through economic times, Zenzo Nyathi’s wife left him. 

This, he recalls, was during the years 2005 and 2007 when things were not going well for him financially. That particular economic crisis swept all before it and TV stars were not spared.

At that time, Nyathi had already made his name as an actor of note, starring in memorable stage productions while giving an irresistible portrayal of Mzambane in Amakhosi’s flagship soapie, Amakorokoza.

So real and authentic was Nyathi’s portrayal of the desperate, wealth-seeking gold panner that the name Mzambane has stuck with him ever since. 

However, while he had dazzled on stage and in front of the camera, it was not reflected in his pockets. It would lead to the departure of his wife, who followed thousands of other Zimbabweans in making the great trek South of the Limpopo. 

When she left, both husband and wife had felt that this was the best decision for a young couple facing up to the realities of raising two young children in economically challenging times. 

“She didn’t run away from me,” Nyathi revealed to Sunday Life.

“This was a collective decision and I remember that at the time our plan was for her to open her own salon because that was what she had always been interested in. I remember I was always hanging around Tashi (Sarah Mpofu) and so I hoped she would become another version of her. So we opened a little boutique in Matshobana and I hoped that with time we would grow and it would become something special like what the likes of Tashi were doing.”

Despite his dreams, Nyathi’s wife had other ideas.  

“That was right around that time when things started getting harder and harder in my life because Zimbabwe around 2005-2007 was not an easy place to live in. My wife came from an affluent family and we decided it would best for her if she went to live and work with her mother who is a prosperous businesswoman in South Africa,” he said.

The bright lights of Johannesburg have been known to dazzle and confuse even the most morally forthright people and although everything had seemed to work out at first, Nyathi’s wife began to change. The frantic calls the actor made to his better half in those days told him that she was not the same woman who had left him in search of a better life.  

“At first things were fine but as I talked to her it gradually became clear that this person didn’t want to come back home,” he said.

Eventually, the actor would listen to his heart, pack his bags and follow his wife to South Africa. There, he found out that his talent could not blossom as it had in Zimbabwe, where he had continued to rivet theatre lovers with compelling performances. After trying to make things work, the union that had been sealed in Zimbabwe came to a less than glamorous end in South Africa. 

It was during this time of great personal turmoil that he found himself turning to God. 

“We talked it over and realised that it wouldn’t end well. When I was going through all this personal turmoil, this was around the time that I started turning to God. I had decided that this life I was living was going around in circles. I was doing the same things over and over again and they were not bringing me happiness.  Nothing changed and I wondered what the point of life was,” he said.

Once bitten, twice shy, the adage goes and with bitter aftertaste from a failed marriage still in mouth, some would have expected Nyathi to be reluctant to go into another one. However, in the institution of marriage Nyathi saw a moral compass, one that would lead him away from temptations that plague many people who live their lives in the limelight. When love found him again, he embraced it with open hands. It was this love that would deepen his resolve to become a man of God. 

“One thing that I can say is that I never loved women but women loved me. That has always been the case throughout my life. It was with that in mind that I decided that for my life to make sense I needed to remarry. 

“I did marry for the second time and that was four or five years after the end of my first marriage. My wife was already a member of ZAOGA and so I joined her there. It changed my life but it also changed hers too because some people started treating her differently whenever I would go to the church,” he said.

The decision has seen Nyathi make a complete u-turn in his life and now equipped with a Diploma in Theology, he is now referred to as a pastor by people he evangelises to. It is a remarkable turnaround in the life of a man who admits that he used to go to church only because it was the fashionable thing to do on Sundays. 

“I was always interested in church. It wasn’t a family thing at all. I know most people say that. For me, my mother went to church once or twice a month and my father would go for long time periods without doing so I wouldn’t call it a family tradition. I got baptised at the Church of Christ in 1991 and that was about the same time that I went to start training and working at Amakhosi. That was the time that I got to experience the showbiz lifestyle. 

“When I went to Amakhosi it was the first time that I got into that life, I was awestruck and fascinated. Looking back at it I can say that those crazy first days were part of my journey I guess. At that time, I remember feeling like I would be holding myself back if I didn’t go all out and enjoy my life. I continued that way until later I went on to join Word of Life around 1999.  I did it, not because I was now a devout Christian, but because most of my friends were already there at that particular church,” he said.

Years after he dedicated his life to Christ, Nyathi says he still gets confused looks from people who do not understand how one can live both as a professional artiste and a dedicated man of God. For him however, despite his love for it, theatre is no longer a way of life but a means to an end, a craft that allows him to put food on the table. 

“Some people in church had a hard time understanding my craft. They looked down on it. Maybe it’s because of the way acting has been regarded or the way we as actors conduct ourselves out there. I’m trying to introduce new things to church like Theatre Sundays which shows that as we worship God, there’s room for us to have fun while doing it. I have gradually become accepted at church. I invited church members to my last play, a few turned up and they are the ones that have gone to educate the rest about what I do,” he said.

Sex on stage!…Sikhonjwa causes stir with no U-18 theatre return

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Bruce Ndlovu, Sunday Life Reporter 

WHEN one talks of sex on stage, most Zimbabweans would expect the mention of Bev and Zoey, those two queens of raunchy dance, to follow. 

Before the strippers that seduce and titillate men on stages in bars and clubs around the country nowadays, Bev and Zoey were the undisputed queens of raunchy in the country. 

At first they were vilified, cursed as an illustration of showbiz gone wrong and a country fast losing its moral fabric. Years after they emerged and despite their waning popularity, Bev and Zoey are still held up as examples of how far the boundaries of creativity, if what they were doing can be called artistic in any way, can be pushed.    

But in time they became accepted, young girls did not run around doing bottle dances and the nation’s moral fabric proved that it was cut from tougher material than some might have thought. It is doubtful whether that duo can ever again pull a stunt that would surprise the nation. 

However, if the holder of the Nama Best Radio Journalist gong and the theatre director and the nominee in the Best Director Category combined to bring what has been touted as Zimbabwe’s first ever R-rated theatre production, it might grab the attention of some. 

A no Under-18 certification in local theatre is unheard of and almost guarantees explicit content that would unsettle even the most experienced of theatre audiences. This is what versatile entertainer Babongile Sikhonjwa and Amakhosi’s Director of Theatre Productions, Thulani Mbambo are promising when their new production, Behind Closed Doors premières. 

The show has already sent tongues wagging and Sikhonjwa, who jokingly refers to it as porn, believes that its shock value will have people flocking through Bulawayo Theatre’s doors on 6 June.        

“This will be the first no Under-18 script in the country. I read the script and I felt that this was something that I would be interested in. This is something new, something different and I felt that this was something that would shake things up and make a difference. 

“I think the fact that my name is on the poster will entice a lot of people. The fact that the play makes it clear that it’s strictly no under 18 will also fascinate people into coming and seeing what we actually will get up to on stage. People are interested in just how far we take it. Will we actually have sex on stage? I think that it’s something that curious theatre lovers should come and witness themselves,” he told Sunday Life.    

Sikhonjwa promised that the production will have steamy scenes that are usually reserved for movie screens.

“A lot of people have said it will be porn on stage. It’s very explicit. We have about three sex scenes throughout the play and it’s all very graphic, it will shock a lot of people. This is not your ordinary kind of theatre,” he said.

However, he noted that all those shocking scenes had a purpose in the context of the entire film. 

“Despite the fact that it’s obviously very explicit, it does not mean that the sex scenes are just gratuitous. It’s not done just for the sake of it but there’s a point that we’re trying to drive across and for it to make sense we will have to go that route,” he said. 

The production’s creator, Mbambo said he had decided to cast the effervescent Sikhonjwa because the play’s main protagonist had similar character traits to the former broadcaster. 

“I had this idea with me from last year but I had not done much with it. Funny enough, it was while we were on our way from the Nama awards that Babongile and I had a discussion and we decided that this was an idea worth pursuing. 

“I felt like it was a character that was tailor made for Babongile. The character of the person in the play is very similar to his own so it worked out perfectly. This is a play that needed people with guts. There are not a lot of people in theatre with those kind of guts but fortunately Babongile is one of the few who do,” he said. 

Mbambo said the production was his own attempt to get people talking about subjects that were thought of as taboo. 

“One thing that we cannot deny is that the divorce rate is currently very high. A lot of marriages are failing because of things that we do but we don’t want to talk about. There’re things that we do in our bedrooms but we’re afraid to reveal to the world. 

“We don’t have grandmothers and uncles that can sit couples down and solve marital problems anymore and so we have taken it upon ourselves to bring these issues to light so that they can be open discussion about them,” he said.

Mbambo said he was not worried about any potential backlash that might come after the play’s debut. 

“I think as theatre practitioners we need to expose ourselves. We should come out in the open and get scrutinised. So it’s fine if people talk after this production. That’s what should happen anyway. We want people’s lives to come out in the open and after that we can start journeying towards the truth,” he said. 

Lat training

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Simon Gama

Back workout

Back day begins with T-bar rows, first with a light set to warm up followed by three heavy sets. I pyramid up, but against “conventional” bodybuilding wisdom, I don’t drop my reps as the poundage increases. I keep going for 12, reaching down deep inside to power through the final excruciating reps. High reps, heavy weight- in that regard, my training philosophy hasn’t changed much since I began lifting.

Next, I continue with an exercise that isolates each side of my back: one-arm dumbbell rows. When I perform these reps I do go semi-slow-never super- slow-controlling that dumbbell instead of just hoisting it full speed to my flank. But because I’m going to the dusty, not so popular end of the dumbbell rack, I don’t hold those monsters up in the top position for a long squeeze. I lift, I contract hard, I return to the start. Strive for that same steady pace in your sets.

After I hit the rows, I switch gears to pull-ups and pulldowns. Rows build the mountains of thickness: pulls widen your lats. When you do the pull- up, if you find you’re not strong enough to do a 12-rep set, work your way up to it. Arnold had a great trick for doing just that. Take the amount of reps you want to complete- if you follow the routine I provide, that would be 36- and proceed to do as many sets as its takes to hit that number. That could be three sets of 10, one set of four. Or four sets of eight, one set of four… You get the idea. Stick to that programme, and you will get strong enough to knock out 3 sets of 12 in a month or two.

Pulldowns may be the last exercise of the day, but that doesn’t mean it time to hit cruise control. Take pulldowns as seriously as you do your first exercise-challenge yourself on your weight selection, and don’t rock backwards on each repetition to get the bar down to your chest lifted and lower back tight and arched. 

T-Bar row

Start/Straddle the T-bar, placing your feet a comfortable distance apart, and maintain a knees-bent position for stability. With your glutes out and abdomen tight, take a wide grip on the bar and get into position, your torso at a 45-degree angle.

Action: Bring the weight all the way up to your chest, and release it all the way down until your elbows are extended. I emphasise the contraction at the top- although there’s no “extra pause” because the weight is too heavy for that-and then reverse the motion slowly.

One Arm dumbbell row

Start: place one leg on a flat bench, one foot the floor for stability. Lean forward from the hips, holding your abs tight to protect your spine.

Action: Bring the weight all the way up to your chest, your elbow moving up toward the floor. Allow the weight to move Straight down, stretching out your lats but maintaining a slight bend in your elbow in the bottom position. Repeat the movement for reps. Vary the position of the dumbbell occasionally, from (a) keeping it parallel to the body throughout, to (b) beginning palm- backward at the bottom and supinating as you pull.

Pulldown to front

Start: Position yourself at the pulldown machine, adjusting the seat so that your knees fit snugly under the pads with your feet firmly planted on the floor. Take a wide grip on the bar.

Action: I tilt back just a little bit and focus on using my lat strength- not my biceps- to bring the bar down all the way to my chest. I get a good contraction, then release the weight back up. With the heavy weight I use, I’m careful to keep good form and maintain control through the entire movement. I get a good stretch through my lats at the top of the movement, and keep my elbows slightly being to protect the joint.-Additional information from online sources

Torture of sex without love

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Nhlalwenhle Ncube

SEX without love is a meaningless experience! Of course, I know someone is laughing at this saying but we are in the 21st century. There are some people who have become so addicted to casual sex and they go about hurting others by just having sex with them and moving on.

If you are a human being, your behaviour should be different from that of animals. Sex should have a meaning in your life and must be a sign of love. 

Sex without love is torture especially for women. Some women find themselves in confusion not knowing whether to be angry at themselves or the man who will have used them. It is hurting to do something out of love only to realise that your efforts are not appreciated. Is it okay to separate love from sex? 

Sex without love is not for everyone. Some people have permanent scars in their hearts because someone just had sex with her or him. They took that as confirmation of love and expected to take their relationship to the next level only to get a bombshell. It hurts to be told that sex was just done for fun and there are no strings attached. You then wonder, what does that person take you for, a sex toy or thigh vendor. You cannot be a thigh vendor because as far as your memory serves you well, you never demanded payment for your services. 

These people who go about hurting others with meaningless sex try to justify their actions by saying it was just a hook up with no strings attached. What they do not know is that there are women and men who want a meaningful romantic relationship to evolve from a hookup. This mainly affects women because most men do not turn to a hookup encounter to find romantic commitment. In fact, when a relationship begins with a hookup, men are less likely to see the woman as a future committed partner. This may be because men report that when they engage in a hookup they do not want the experience to evolve into a permanent romantic relationship.

Women are left heartbroken after such experiences because they will be feeling guilty, used and even develop low self-esteem. Women are motivated by connection, attachment and emotional intimacy. They often long for commitment and feeling deeply cherished by a man in their life. This means that those who are told that it was just sex and must not read much from it and expect too much are likely to become more depressed with each subsequent uncommitted sexual experience. 

All things being fair, women typically use a hookup as a way to establish a deeper more meaningful relationship with a man. Many women hope that having sex with a particular partner will open the door to getting to know the person better and, ideally, a future relationship. Women put a high value on relationships, much higher than might be portrayed in the 21st century culture. 

A history of hooking up often reflects someone who is deeply yearning for real love and care and yet has adopted a pattern that makes finding emotional intimacy difficult. The lack of authenticity involved in these sterile attachments leaves women deeply disappointed and oftentimes painfully self-critical as they beat themselves up for what they should or should not have done.

Adolescent girls and adult women in a pattern of hooking up feel extremely self-conscious about their bodies, their mood is often down or depressed, and they engage in repetitive negative thinking. 

They feel uncomfortable with intimacy, which makes it hard for them to both find a committed partner and to be a committed partner. 

They feel alone and unfulfilled. They have difficulty understanding their emotional world, which makes it challenging for them to communicate effectively in order to have their needs understood and met by the men in their lives. 

These roadblocks have women turning to sex not as a result of emotional intimacy but as a way to attain a short-term burst of relief from shaky self-esteem and loneliness. Unfortunately, it haunts them again! 

Each and every person has to choose what he or she wants. So before you hurt someone, at least be honest and mention that even if you have sex with her it’s not your signature of confirming that you in love. If they agree, then you can go ahead. 

At the same time, you can also ask your partner whether he loves you or just wants sex. When you get into it knowing its meaning, you save yourself from a heartbreak. 

With that freedom and choice comes great responsibility and the important task of taking care of your emotional self and how both of you want she it to be. 

While it has been historically more common for men to have sex and keep it just about the physical connection, with few or no feelings of intimacy involved, women may struggle with separating the two. 

Often, despite one’s best intentions, emotions come into play, since women often feel most vulnerable when they are in intimate situations and often literally and symbolically feel naked.

It is important to be loud and clear with your intentions. Never take it for granted that its obvious love and sex go together or that sex does not mean love. People are different and expectations are not the same. 

Share your views on womenforum460@gmail.com

Mzansi radio turns down Zim singer

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Rumbidzai Mhlanga, Sunday Life Reporter

ONE of Bulawayo’s finest musicians Sizalobuhle Nkomo warmly known as Msiz’kay has had his music turned down by a South African radio station.

The artiste sent the Bayatshilwa album last month to South Africa’s YFM and got the response recently which informed him about the rejection.

 “I only received an email that said my application to be play listed was unsuccessful but I should continue to forward new music to them as I release it. There was no specific reason as to why my album was rejected. I later learnt that it had nothing to do with me being Zimbabwean because, Rabs Vhafuwi, a South African artiste also received a similar email and that was somehow a relief,” he added

When asked if the rejection made him doubt his work, he said instead, it encouraged him to work harder.

“The first reaction was one of disappointment. I was crushed because, although I have confidence in the work that I do, they made me feel as if my music was not good enough. But after that I was motivated to work even harder just so I can get to that point where I can be play-listed on any radio station anywhere in the world.”

Msiz’kay promised his fans that rejection will not put him down or make him change his music genre.

“The style, the feel and the texture of the music will remain the same because that is what sets me apart from other artistes, but I will take it upon myself to improve on the technical aspects of the music that I make, so it is at par with international standards or beyond that is in terms of quality and sound,” he said.

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